Episode #207. What’s the best way to start off the new year? I keep going back to an exercise I walked through in our Best Quarter Ever workshop and today I’m excited to share it with you here. If you’ve ever found that a vision board doesn’t quite get you to your goals or you just really need an extra boost of inspiration, this one’s for you!
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
- Why a vision board can get you in a state of disconnect
- The visualization exercise to get you more in alignment
- How to manage the negative feelings around your goals
- A backwards way to look at your goals for a big mindset shift
“A vision board is all about the things that you want. It’s acknowledging that you’re in a state of want and lack. That resistance is not helping you get there any faster.”
“In 2020, my word of the year was ‘No’. I’m very sorry and yes, I have a lot of regrets about that. So I’m not doing anything like that this year, but I’m feeling the good year energy, and I hope you are too.”
“What were you feeling after achieving your goals? Were you feeling excited? Were you feeling proud? Did you wonder if it would ever happen again or feel overwhelmed? Sometimes when we have our best month or best quarter ever it brings up negative things too.”
Discussed on the Show
Jaclyn Mellone: Welcome to Go-To Gal episode number 207. As always, I’m your host, Jaclyn Mellone. And a happy new year! Gosh, I am excited that it is 2022. I’m feeling the good 2022 vibes. I hope you are too. I’m not going to go as far as saying it’s going to be my year, your year, our year. I’m not making any bold word of the year claims. I’m just going to say in 2020, my word of the year was no. Yes, I have a lot of regrets about that. I’m sorry. I’m very sorry. So we’re not doing anything like that this year. But I’m feeling the good year energy, and I hope you are too. So let’s see, we have a lot to dive into today. So first of all, this week, it’s not this specific day that the episode is released on but it’s the first episode of the new year. And three years ago, the first episode of the new year was our first ever episode of Go-To Gal. So it’s our three-year anniversary of this week. Gosh, three years has really flown by in so many ways. So much has changed. In other ways, it feels like we’ve been at this forever. So yes, I’ve been podcasting since 2015. But the Go-To Gal Podcast itself has been around for just the last three years. Although, I guess three years in podcasting is still a pretty long time. We’re over 200 episodes now and yes, I’m excited for what’s to come. And I know we recently did the 200th episode. If you miss episode 200, you definitely want to go back and listen because it was probably one of the podcast episodes of 2021 that I got the most responses and feedback to. So you definitely want to go back and listen to that one.
I’m like, okay, so what’s a different take that we could do? Or do we even want to do a theme around it being three years? Is that just completely self-indulgent? What’s the best thing to start off the new year? And like the more I kept thinking about the three years of Go-To Gal and celebrating the three years of Go-To Gal myself, I kept going back to this exercise that I walked through in our Best Quarter Ever workshop. Well, the Best Quarter Ever workshop is still available for free. And it’s a pretty long workshop. I don’t know exactly how long off the top of my head. What we decided to do is just pull out a part of the training so you could hear this because I’m like, I can record a whole episode talking about the strategy, this tool that I created that I walk you through how to do, how to create it in the workshop. I’m like, I could just spend the whole episode talking about it or alluding to it or teasing you about it, but why don’t we just give it to you because maybe you missed the promotion for Best Quarter Ever, or maybe you’re doing something right now where you’re going to forget to opt-in for it later. But I want you to know about this.
So listen, I know it is the start of the year and maybe you’re starting strong and you’re full steam ahead with something new. Maybe you’re like, oh, I got to get back into work mode or something in between. Wherever you are, this exercise is something you can come back to time and time again. And I don’t want to say it replaces the vision board because I still think there’s a time and a place for a vision board. I know we’re probably going to title this something like Ditch The Vision Board. But honestly, I really did stop doing vision boards in favor of doing this because one, I find that it really helps align me with what I really want better. So strategically, if you are a more logical person, if you’re manifesting that’s woo woo, I don’t believe in that. Then I’ll say this exercise is going to be a great way to help you celebrate how and acknowledge, how far you’ve come and helped you align with focusing on and having intention around the activities, the goals, the projects, the feelings that you really want to be feeling. And it’s going to keep you on that track. Now, if you are woo-ish or maybe very woo. What I will say, where I think a vision board falls short for me personally is it’s separate. It’s something that I don’t have yet. And yes, I can get myself into that mode of visualizing and feeling. And I have had vision boards work for me, at least seemingly so, over the years for certain things, not for everything. But I don’t know if it ever works for everything. But there is something that always fell off with it. And I think I finally pinpointed it.
So the vision board is all things that you want. It’s all things in the future. It’s all your future. You were once you do X, Y, Z, then you will have this or go there or move there, or experience this. Well, by looking at this, by acknowledging it, it’s you’re in a state of want. And when you’re in a state of want, that’s being in a state of lack. You’re basically acknowledging that you don’t have it now. It’s separate from you. It is something that you want. And depending on what’s on your vision board, you may even have multiple layers of that to work through because it may not even just be that the wanting or being in that lack of having those things. But you may even think that it’s impossible to have those things, and just got carried away in a moment, making a fun vision board of when you look at it you’re like, this feels so far away or this feels impossible, and there’s a disconnect there. And that, that resistance, that disconnect, that wanting, that lacking feeling is preventing you from getting there. It’s not contributing to helping you get there any faster. So those are my thoughts on the vision board. Now, I do think getting clarity on what you want and how you want that to feel is really important. And if it helps you to visualize it into a vision board, I don’t see anything wrong with that.
But I think if that’s the only thing that we’re focusing on, or if that’s something that we keep coming back to, especially if you’re struggling with any of the things that I mentioned, every time you look at it, it might be bringing up that feeling of the wanting or the lacking or the hurdles, and not the feeling of the experiencing of those things. So how do we get around this? Or what’s something that we could do that is more powerful, that is easier to get in alignment with? So my suggestion, what I’ve been doing and what I’m now teaching in this Best Quarter Ever workshop, and now we’re going to bring that to you here on the podcast is, and I don’t have a fancy name for it yet. I need a fancy name. If you’re listening and you have an idea for a fancy name, feel free to DM me. I’m accepting suggestions. So I don’t have a fancy name for it yet, but essentially what I want you to do, and I’m going to walk you through this and the exercise but I’ll give you that snapshot of it is essential, oh, maybe I shouldn’t.
Okay, you know what, if I try to explain this-now I’m really probably they’re just going to repeat myself or I’m going to be all over the place. So I’m not going to leave you hanging but we’re going to cut over now to the training. Now, if you’re driving or walking or doing something right now where you can’t visualize which is likely the case, you’re probably multitasking in some way. You can listen through without doing the visualization and then go do this another time. Please implement. The magic comes when you take action, not just from listening to it, but I don’t know. I don’t believe that if I need one of those disclaimers of like, don’t listen while driving. There’s no meditation music. I’m not trying to hypnotize you or anything. It’s really just a series of prompts that I’ll walk you through and the visualization piece. And then I’ll walk you through the exercise to do after. But you do need to get some insight from that visualization to know how to take action with the tool after. It’ll all make sense once you listen to the training. So enjoy. I’m excited that we can share this with you on the podcast. If you do want the whole training though, because this is just one piece of the Best Quarter Ever training, go to jaclynmellone.com/bqeworkshop to get access for free. And if you want to join us for Best Quarter Ever, there is still time to do that too. And that information will be there after you opt-in for the free training. So, all right, let’s jump into the training.
Before we start with visualization. I want you to just if you have a sheet of paper, you know, I almost put together a Google doc worksheet and I’m like, I really don’t want your writing. So I’m hopeful that you have a notebook or something nearby. And I just want you to write out a couple of the goals that you have in mind for Q1. This is not to be super specific or analytical, but if you have a revenue goal in mind, if you have any project goals like, ah, I want to watch this website or even watch a course. Or if there’s something like that that you have in mind, maybe hire a team member, anything like that that comes to mind, have some things fresh on the top of your head before we get into this visualization. And if you can try to process in just a minute or two, what it would look like to have Q1 be your Best Quarter Ever, what would that be? What would that look like? What would that look like in terms of revenue, or how much you’re working? Just jot a couple of things down.
So this visualization is going to help you get a little bit more clear on some of those goals that you wrote down and maybe some new goals are going to pop up through it. And we’re going to pull some things out of it to work through together after. So right now, there are only a few of you on camera. So the rest of you who’s on our system, but for those of you on camera, for all of you here, I want you to close your eyes, and let’s pick a day in April. So this is after Q1. I want you to pick a specific day in April where you’re going to put yourself, you’re going to fast forward through Q1, put yourself into this day, and just, we’re going to walk through picturing this day. But it could be a workday, it could be a weekend. You could be on vacation, celebrating a holiday that’s coming in April, anything like that. Pick a certain day in April.
What is happening during this day? Is there something happening that usually happens or something new because you just having your best quarter ever. So put yourself into that situation. What are you doing on this day? Maybe you’re doing more of something that you love. Maybe you’re doing something new that you haven’t had a chance to do before. But here you are in April, he just had your best quarter ever. Are you working from someplace different? Maybe you joined a co-working space or you’re working from a coffee shop. Maybe you’re on vacation and didn’t even bring your laptop. What is the rest of your day look like? And really try to pull in like, okay, so if everything that I want to happen happens in Q1, how does that affect this day? Are you talking with your new team member? Are you working with your new coaching clients? Is there anything that you feel so relieved you don’t have to do today as a result of having your best quarter ever? Again, try to go back to, okay, if my best quarter ever all of this happened, what does that mean? So how else is that showing up on that day?
During this day, I want you to reach out to someone and share with them that you just had your best quarter ever. Who are you going to reach out to? Maybe it’s someone to who you always reach out and tell good news. Maybe it’s someone or a bunch of people who are new in your life. Maybe it’s a coach or a mastermind, some new business friends, some people you met at a conference you went to, a new biz bestie, or maybe someone who’s just an acquaintance now but now you’re super close with them, or it could be someone in your personal life. What are you so excited to tell them about just having your best quarter ever? What are you the most proud to share? Is there anything that you’re proud of, or maybe you’re a little embarrassed to share? Maybe you share it anyway, or maybe you don’t share it. How do you feel about sharing it? Now, maybe it feels good to share, or maybe some not-good feelings come up with this. That’s okay. Be true to you here, but how does it feel sharing your best quarter ever with them?
All right, now, you’re done talking with them. You’re reflecting. You’re taking some time to yourself now on this day and just reflecting on your best quarter ever. And how and where you are now in Q2? Now, this is a quarter away. This isn’t years away. But still, what’s the most different? What are you feeling grateful for over this past quarter? What are you most impressed with about yourself? Did anything surprise you about yourself? Was anything a struggle for you? What else are you celebrating? Now, this could be business. It could be personal. And I want you to think of something amazing that happens that maybe you weren’t planning on it. What is one of your goals? You couldn’t have planned for it, but just this amazing surprise thing happened. What could that be? You never believed it could have happened. And just give yourself another minute to just soak it all up. You’re celebrating. How are you feeling? What are you excited about? How are you thinking about Q2? Good or bad?
Okay, open up your eyes. We’re back in December now. Oh, all right. How did that feel? Do any of you want to share just a little bit of what came up for you during that? Anything that you surprised yourself by with it? Or what are you the most excited about thinking into April, what that’s going to be like?
Speaker 1: Hi. I thought skipping forward, I felt like there was such a hassle going on so much that I realized I have to, along with planning all the exciting stuff, I should really also focus on my self-care routine and taking that along. So I’m not too surprised by being so successful that I can manage it well.
Jaclyn Mellone: Yes. Oh, that’s such a good, you know, sometimes in these, we were able to feel into the great feelings of the accomplishment and having our best month ever. But sometimes it brings up this other stuff which is great to realize now because now you can plan for that. So that is a very powerful takeaway. Does anyone else have something to say? Okay, well, if anyone’s thinking about sharing, what I want you to do is think about what came up for you during this visualization and write down two separate categories but of feelings. So we want to write down the feelings that were the good feelings that came up. How did it feel to be making that call and sharing the good news? What were you feeling after achieving your goals? Were you feeling excited? Were you feeling proud? Were you feeling accomplished? What are the feelings that came up and fast-forwarding there? And then in another column, were there any negative feelings that came up? That’s okay too. Sometimes when we have our best month or our best quarter ever, it brings up like, is this ever going to happen again? Or this is a lot of responsibility, or I’m feeling burned out or things like that. So any of the good feelings that came up and any of the bad feelings. And if you’re having a hard time identifying the feelings and we think of the things that stood out the most for you or that you felt the most good to be experiencing or reflecting on, and I try to bring yourself back to that moment of how that would feel.
So what are some of the feelings, what are some of the good feelings, the positive feelings that you would use to describe having your best quarter ever? Or the results of having your best quarter ever? Contentment, what else? Excited, rewarded, satisfied, excited for all that’s possible. So I want you to come up with at least three feelings. Relieved, accomplished, validated, joyful, present, all these are great. Pride. Relief. Yes, so good. Okay, so here’s what I want you to do with this. With this newfound information for the feelings that you want to feel. If we’re looking at, okay, this is what it feels like to hit your goals, this is what it feels like to have your best quarter ever. These are the feelings we want to create. We don’t just want to create the outcome or the check-the-box so you hit that goal, we want to create that experience of feeling those feelings.
Now, this is where I have found it’s best to get in alignment with feeling those feelings. A lot of times with vision boards, people say the best way to do a vision board, and this is the way that I do my vision boards is to put on their experiences or things that are going to make you feel the way you want to feel. And those are projecting into the future things that you want. And I think that’s a great thing to do. But what I found more powerful is actually do it in reverse. I need a good name for this. I haven’t come up with a good name yet. Oh, this is only the second time I’m sharing those publicly. So we’re still working on a name for it. But I didn’t want that to stop me from sharing it with you because I know how powerful this tool is. So what I want you to do is take those three of you, or five feelings, ten might be overwhelming. But take those 2, 3, 5 feelings that you identified as the primary feelings. And what I want you to do, and we can do this right now in terms of just brainstorming ideas. But I will talk about how you can turn this into a visual thing later.
I don’t have time to do that part of it. What I want you to do is look backward and think about, okay, what is the time over the last year? And maybe you want to go back even further. That’s okay, too. It can be going back three years, five years, where you felt those feelings. Now, this can be in your personal life, it can be in your professional life. It can be in this business. It could be in a past business. It does not need to be the thing you’re trying to create or achieve. It just needs to be something that brings out that feeling. So when have you felt validated before? When have you felt proud of yourself before? When have you felt joyful? Hopefully, there’s a lot of times that come up when you felt joyful. When have you felt relieved? And just start brainstorming so you can put a column for each feeling and just start brainstorming different experiences from the past year or going back further where you have had that feeling.
Right now, we’re just brainstorming what those experiences are. If you want to find the visuals for this and make a vision board of these past experiences, you can do that too. But what I found is us syncing into and connecting with how you can identify with those feelings. So going back to situations where you felt them before helps those feelings feel more real. It helps you connect and align with that energy that’s going to put you on the path to create that again.
One of my favorite mottos to share with clients and students is we can be incredibly grateful for everything we have and still want more. And sometimes, it feels like in the wanting of the more and the goal-setting stage, the stage right now, it can feel like, oh, I’ve done all this but that’s not enough because I want more. Or you can almost feel if you’ve accomplished a lot this year, you should just be grateful for what you’ve done. I feel guilty wanting more. Or if you haven’t hit your goals, it can feel like, I feel like I am not giving myself credit for what I’ve done, or I’m always looking for more and not thinking into that gratitude. So I think those exercise also helps us really find that gratitude for the times that we’ve created those feelings that we really value the most and that we want to create. And creating that and experience of, yes, you can be grateful for all of this and still be going after more. And when we’re in that place of gratitude, I find that as when we’re creating the more with much more ease. Yes, for sure.
So, okay. Take another minute to just be jotting down different experiences on each of those feeling categories. Okay, so this list is a good starting point. Now that we’ve planted this seed of when have you felt joyful? When have you felt contentment? Don’t be surprised if in the shower, on the walk, in the car, you start getting these other memories, these other hits of, oh, there was that time. So this is definitely something you can keep adding to. And if you want to have fun with it, get Canva or get a printer and start putting together how can you visually represent some of these things in the past? Does anyone want to share some of maybe past experiences that connect with the feeling that you’re looking to achieve with your goal? Has anyone has an example or two that they want to share? They’re open to sharing.
Speaker 2: Are you saying like an example of this being done successfully in the past?
Jaclyn Mellone: So what was one of your feelings that came up? Pride, I think I’m looking back. Pride or relief. So with pride, what are some other examples or experiences where you have felt proud of yourself, where you felt that pride?
Speaker 2: Yes, okay. I took Meg Casebolt’s course on SEO last year in January, and I had been thinking I had to put all this energy into social media and put a lot of energy into struggling to find the time for social media. Well, after I basically audited all of my traffic to my business, where it was coming from. So little was coming from social media granted that hadn’t been my strength. But I’d spent a year trying to beef it up. After a year of really working on it, not much was coming from it. And I discovered that really, I had been doing a lot of the right things when it comes to search engine optimization and using keywords that people use to search for what I do. I’m a hairstylist. And so I was really proud of that because instinctively had done the right thing and built my website. And I had built a website, paid for it to be built the year before. That had paid off so much that my traffic was really high in that area. I felt pride, but also relief, and that I didn’t have to spend so much time and energy on social media.
Jaclyn Mellone: Yes. Oh, that’s the perfect example for you putting pride and relief down to you. So looking back on, and you can go back further of opening your salon or raising your rates, launching that site, doing some bold moves with the technology that other people weren’t doing. So all of those things, if I was you, I would feel very proud of those things.
Speaker 2: I’m still surprised that I was like, oh my God, I’ve been spending all this stress over this one thing that isn’t even paying off as much as money and time as I was putting into it. So that was a beautiful thing.
Jaclyn Mellone: Yes, so for something like that, you could take a screenshot of search results, or even just a screenshot of your web page or something like that where you’re able to visually display that feeling of pride from the past. And as you’re setting your goals going forward to be able to recognize not just the achievements of the past but the ones that really resonate with those feelings that you want to create. There’s a nuance to this because sometimes we do things that other people are impressed by, but that maybe don’t feel the way that we would hope that they would have felt, or that we’re realizing we want to feel now. Pulling out those things that maybe other people wouldn’t even think are impressive looking back or other people are like, that’s what you’re proud of with everything you’ve done? But it’s the truest for you or you’re like, that’s what made you feel content. So don’t worry about what someone else would have you assessed. It’s really what is bringing up those? What’s evoking those feelings for you?
So now, we’ve done the visualization. We’ve got all touchy-feely with the emotions of things. Now, let’s switch back into goals mode for a little bit here.
All right, and stop recording. I’m actually not pressing any magical buttons. But I’m cutting myself of, and this is where we’re going to end the podcast episode. I wanted to give you this whole mindset piece of it, about the visualization and this exercise to connect the dots into. So go implement this. Go do this. Just listening is not enough. We got something maybe from just listening, but the magic really comes from when you actually do this. And when you continue to use this tool. It should be a living, breathing thing that you keep revisiting just like you would a vision board, honestly. But with this, it’s bringing you back to those core feelings that you’re going after and really going to keep you centered and on track to hit those goals. Now, if you’re like, but wait, you were just going to get into the goals part. I want to know more about that. Well, lucky you, that training is still up. So you can go to jaclynmellone.com/bqeworkshop, and you can get access to the full training for free there, jaclynmellone.com/bqeworkshop. And if you want to join us for Best Quarter Ever, it’s not too late. All the information will be there when you log in as well. All right, that’s a wrap for today. Happy new year! Cheers to you having your best quarter ever. And go take some action. All right, as always, I’m cheering you on.
Can I just say thank you so much for listening? I don’t think I say it enough, but I love that you are here. If you enjoy today’s episode, or if you’ve been getting value from this podcast, can you do me a quick favor? Head on over to iTunes and leave a rating and review. When you leave a rating and review, it basically tells iTunes that they need to spread the word and tell more people about this podcast, and I am on a mission to get the word out. I’m so grateful for your support. We want to make sure to shout you out too. So if you do leave a rating and review, keep your eyes and ears open. We will be either shouting out on the podcast or on Instagram Stories.
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